


Across Time and Space, I Will Find You

by until_next_time_sweetie



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who RPF
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-16
Updated: 2014-09-01
Packaged: 2018-01-16 00:18:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 15,929
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1324663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/until_next_time_sweetie/pseuds/until_next_time_sweetie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Came up with this idea just now in the shower. It's actually a play off of another idea I had, and have been meaning to start. I figured I better do it now before I forget.</p>
    </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Came up with this idea just now in the shower. It's actually a play off of another idea I had, and have been meaning to start. I figured I better do it now before I forget.

He first met her as a little girl. 

His TARDIS had crashed into her back garden wall when he was trying to land. He had just regenerated into his eleventh form, and wasn't quite as familiar with the controls as he should have been. He patted the console, hearing it let out a soft hum, and made his way to the door.

When he opened it, he was greeted by a generously sized lawn full of green grass, a few trees, and flowers everywhere, of every possible color. In the middle of it was was a child with golden ringlets framing her face. Her eyes appeared green, and they were full of curiosity as she looked at the strange man and mysterious blue box that had appeared from thin air.

He walked slowly up to her, in case she decided to run, but she didn't. She remained in her place, clutching a teddy bear to her chest. Kneeling down, he got close enough to look her over, his own eyes reflecting her own curiosity. Once he had read her expression, his lips spread into a smile.

"Hello." He said.

"Hello." She replied.

"What's your name?"

"Alex."

"Hello, Alex. Do you happen to know what year this is?"

"1968. I know for a fact because I've just had my fifth birthday." She proclaimed as she held up her open hand to show off her five fingers.

"You're a clever girl, aren't you. Though, not cleverer than me."

"What makes you so special?"

"Because I'm the Doctor. I come from a place very far from here, and I'm the last of my kind. I am older than you will ever be, and I've seen things you will never see. Though, in some respects, you should consider yourself lucky. No one should see the things I have." His expression became somber as he looked down at the grass surrounding her little black shoes.

"What's that box?"

"It's my TARDIS. It's how I travel throughout time and space! She's a great old girl."

"If _she's _so great, why did she crash into the garden fence? My parents won't be happy."__

__"Did you not hear that I've traveled through time and space? How was I to know there would be a fence there?" He paused to look around again. "Where exactly am I?"_ _

__"Surrey."_ _

__"Mm, I see. By your accent, I assume I must be somewhere in England, right?"_ _

__"Yes, you're not far from London, if that was your original destination."_ _

__"Such a big vocabulary already." He smiled again and pinched her chubby cheek. "But I'm afraid I'll be staying here until I can fix my TARDIS. Not here here, as in your house. There's plenty of room in the ship." Alex looked over his shoulder and arched a questioning eyebrow._ _

__"Where would you possibly sleep in that? It can't be that comfortable."_ _

__"See, I told you you weren't cleverer than me! It's bigger on the inside, you silly girl."_ _

__"That's impossible."_ _

__"Look for yourself, then."_ _

__The Doctor stood up and turned slowly to watch Alex walk up to the police box. She examined the outside before opening the door and poking her head in. She gasped as she saw the console room that was as big as the first floor of her house. Closing the door, she then looked around the outside again before gazing inside._ _

__"How is that possible?" She asked as she faced him._ _

__"Time Lord ingenuity. You wouldn't understand."_ _

__"What's a Time Lord?"_ _

__"You wouldn't understand that, either."_ _

__"I may be a little girl, but I'm not stupid!" She stomped off toward the house, but fell to her knees before she reached the patio. He could hear her sniffling, and he headed over to  
try and comfort her._ _

__"What's the matter?"_ _

__"There's something wrong with my little sister, but my parents won't tell me. All they say is that she was born different, but when I look at her, she just looks like a normal baby."_ _

__"Maybe her difference isn't on the outside. Maybe it's inside."_ _

__"I've heard them say there's something wrong with her brain. That it isn't like mine, and she'll never be able to have a normal life like me. That makes me sad."_ _

__"You shouldn't be. Your sister is going to be special, and you should always treat her kindly. Be the best big sister she could ask for."_ _

__"I will, I promise." A smile spread across her face to reveal her tiny teeth._ _

__"You have a very pretty smile, Alex. Everyone deserves to see it."_ _

__"Thank you, Doctor." She wrapped her little arms around his neck, and he pressed a hand to her back as he returned the hug. "I have to go inside now. It's getting dark, and it's  
almost time for supper. Will I see you tomorrow?"_ _

__"I don't think so." Her face bore a frown then. "But, I'm sure we'll meet again some day."_ _

__"You won't remember me." She called after him as he walked back to his TARDIS._ _

__"I'd never forget you, Alex Kingston."_ _

__She was about to ask how he knew her last name, but he closed the door and seconds later, the blue box faded away until all she could see was the broken bit of fence. Obeying her mother's instruction, she went into the house and told them all about the Doctor. They passed him off as an imaginary friend, and she soon grew tired of trying to convince them otherwise._ _

__As she lay in bed that night, she wondered if she would ever see him again. She really hoped so._ _


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I got the order of Alex's sisters wrong, so I apologize for that.

When she woke up the next morning, she rushed downstairs at to the kitchen to look out the patio door in hopes of seeing the TARDIS again. It wasn't there, but she opened the door and ventured out into the chilly air. The fence was mended, looking like it had never been broken. 

When she got to the place where he had landed, Alex reached out but could only feel the wood of the fence. With a sigh, she went back inside and was greeted cheerfully by her mother. Margarethe picked her up and kissed her cheek, which she returned with a sleepy smile.

"What were you doing outside?"

"I was looking for the Doctor." She pointed out the window where the broken fence had been. "He was right there yesterday."

"I think you imagined him, Alex. You've always had a big imagination."

"I'm telling you he's real. I saw him. He said he was a Time Lord, and he even knew my last name even though I never told him!"

"There are no such things as Time Lords."

"Not anymore, he's the only one left. He's special, just like he said about Susan."

"What did you tell him about her?"

"Only that you say there's something wrong with her brain, but I wish you would tell me the truth, mummy. I know you think I'm a stupid little girl, but I would understand if you explained it."

"We don't think you're stupid, Alex. Just--"

"Too young to understand. I don't care if she's different, I'll still love her because she's my sister. The Doctor told me to do my best to look out for her, and I promised him I would."

"It would really help out your father and me. Perhaps, if you keep being such a good girl, the Doctor can stick around."

But, of course, he wouldn't. Alex didn't know what he got up to when he went traveling, but he still visited her every night before she went to sleep. It went on for about six months, his visits becoming less frequent, until he stopped coming altogether. She wondered what had happened to him, but she soon forgot about him, like he no doubt did about her.

xXx

As Alex continued to grow up, she had become really close to Susan. She treated her as though she were a regular little girl, both of them playing dolls together, and Alex making up her own stories to go with the game. She continued to be a good little girl for her parents, remembering her promise to the Doctor, and hoping that her behavior would bring him back. It never did.

The year she turned seven, she got a new baby sister name Nicola. She was excited because it meant someone new to play with. Alex wished he would come to meet her, but something told her he wouldn't. She hoped he was alright and that he was just busier than usual.

The years passed and she gradually blossomed into a teenager. Margarethe had gotten her to fill in as a model for her art class, and Alex really enjoyed it. She didn't even mind that she was naked in front of strangers because she understood that it was for art, not pleasure.

She had noticed the change in her body as she grew up, and all the strange new feelings and sensations that went with it. Her mother had given her the sex talk, and that touching herself wasn't something to be ashamed of, as long as it was done in private. The nights she had spent pleasuring herself in bed, she was thankful that the Doctor hadn't come back.

She had gotten her first boyfriend at 15, but they hadn't been together long enough to go all the way. Another boy came and went when she was 16, but she still remained a virgin. It wasn't until she was 17 that she had finally met someone with whom she felt comfortable enough to have sex with.

It hurt at first, but she was happy that the deed was finally done. He was a nice boy, and her parents really liked him, but he ended up breaking her heart. She cried for weeks afterward, and Margarethe had done everything she could to console her little girl. All she did was assure Alex that someone would eventually come along, and they did.

She met Ralph at RADA. It had been her dream ever since she was little to become an actress, and after a small part in _Grange Hill _and a few smaller parts in films, she auditioned for the college, and was delighted when she was accepted. There were new people to meet, and as her mother had said, new boys to fall in love with.__

__When she first saw him, she couldn't believe how handsome he was. Every girl went crazy over him, but when he looked at her the first time, she swore her heart stopped for a brief moment. She gave him a shy wave and smile, and he mouthed hello back. Alex felt herself blush as he summoned her over to him._ _

__"You're new here, aren't you?" He asked in that deep, sensual voice of his._ _

__"Yeah, I just started last week." She replied bashfully._ _

__"Congratulations for getting in. If they had judged based on looks, I can certainly see why they chose you."_ _

__"Thank you."_ _

__"You have a very beautiful smile. Everyone in the world should see it."_ _

__Her mind suddenly flashed back to when she was five years old, standing in her back garden with the Doctor. His words played through her mind over and over. Alex hadn't thought about her childhood friend in years, but it was as though a part of her had always remembered him._ _

__"Are you alright?" Ralph's voice brought her out of her thoughts._ _

__"Yeah, sorry. You just reminded me of someone I used to know."_ _

__"I'd like to get to know you. Starting with your name."_ _

__"It's Alex."_ _

__"Well, Alex, I hope I see you around."_ _

__He left her with a flirty smirk, and she watched him as he walked away. He was the most handsome man she had ever met, and she definitely wanted to get to know him. Then again, now that she had remembered the Doctor, she wanted to get to know him better as well._ _


	3. Chapter 3

Throughout the next week, Alex had gotten to know Ralph pretty well, having gone on three dates already. She was beginning to like him a lot, and he had already stolen her heart. She couldn't believe that he seemed to fancy her as well, considering there were so many other girls in school that would gladly drop their panties for him in a heartbeat.

Whenever he would pick her up after classes, she could feel the gaze of the other girls. They were jealous of her because she had him. Sometimes she wondered what he ever saw in her. There were so many other girls that were much prettier than she was, but somehow he only had eyes for her. 

Alex couldn't believe that, after their third date, he never pressured her into having sex with him. She gladly would have, but didn't want to make the first move for fear he thought of her as a slut. She figured he hadn't have been a virgin (good looking men like Ralph hardly ever were), so she was puzzled as to why they hadn't slept together. After their fifth date, she decided to ask.

"Please don't take this the wrong way, but I was wondering why we haven't... you know." She said as they were sitting on the sofa in his apartment.

"I wasn't sure if you were ready, so I didn't pressure you into thinking you had to."

"I've done it before, so you're not my first."

"Don't look so ashamed, love. You're not my first either."

"I was afraid you'd think of me as a tart." She blushed, but smiled when he cupped her cheek.

"I'd never think of you like that. I know you wouldn't give your body away to just anyone."

"And you're not anyone. We have been going out for a little over a week now, and I'm ready if you are."

Alex smiled against his lips when he leaned in to kiss her. They had at least gotten that far in their five dates, but she gasped when his hand came up to cup her breast. She hadn't been touched like that since her last boyfriend a year ago, but she remembered how good it had felt.

They undressed each other slowly and he prepared her for penetration. When he entered her, she gasped at the slight pain, but passed it off as nothing. The pace was gentle but gradually increased until he reached his release minutes later. He collapsed on top of her, breathing harshly against her neck.

"I hope I didn't hurt you." He said as they cuddled together.

"A little, but I think it's because I haven't done it in awhile."

Though, in her head she knew the real reason. She hadn't been wet enough to allow a comfortable entrance. She didn't want him to know because she was still crazy about him, and perhaps the next time would be better. It was the first time she had ever gone unsatisfied, but didn't say anything so as not to upset him. Of course things would be better next time.

xXx

They weren't. As much as she wanted to enjoy the sex, she just couldn't. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't arouse her well enough for the penetration not to hurt. He began to get frustrated, and Alex feared he would dump her for someone who would get wet for him.

Just as she feared, their relationship began to fizzle out - until she came up with an idea to save it: she began faking her orgasms. It seemed wrong to have to lie to him, but Ralph was glad that he could finally get her off. Things were looking up again, and their relationship continued happily.

The first time he hit her, he swore it was an accident and that he would never do it again. But then the slaps became more frequent. Then came the punches and bruises. Alex knew it was her fault that he was so angry, but didn't want to leave him because she was sure no one else would want her.

She hid the marks well and didn't tell anyone about her abusive boyfriend. Not even her mother. She didn't have many friends at college, so the secret was kept for many months. Though, something needed to change because she was getting tired of crying to herself in the tub every night.

When he asked her to move in with him, she said yes immediately. Not because she really wanted to, but because she was terrified of what he would do if she declined. He helped her pack that weekend, and things began nicely once she was settled into his flat. Alex was very good not to do or say anything that would upset him, and the abuse stopped... for awhile.

The next time, things got a little out of hand and he ended up giving her a black eye. She ran from the apartment (after putting on sunglasses), but didn't know where to go. While she was running, she passed a mysterious blue box which caused her to stop. Going up to it, she knocked on the door, but when there was no answer, she tried to go in but it was locked.

Her heart pounded at the thought of seeing the Doctor again. She looked around frantically, but couldn't see his tell-tale brown suit and floppy hair. With a sigh, she continued walking with her head down. It wasn't until she ran into someone that she had to look up and apologize.

She could have sworn her heart stopped beating as she looked at the familiar face of the Doctor. He hadn't changed a bit since the last time she saw him all those years ago. He had a kind smile, and his eyes were every bit as curious as she remembered. Though, the look on his face was of confusion, like she was just another person on the street.

"Doctor? Don't you remember me? It's Alex. You landed your TARDIS in my back garden when I was five and broke the fence." His dull green eyes lit up then as he remembered, which caused her to smile.

"Ah, yes, little Alex Kingston! Well, not so little anymore. How long has it been?"

"Almost 14 years. You haven't changed. You still look exactly the same."

"The wonders of a Time Lord."

"I've followed your advice and I'm studying to become an actress. You said everyone should see my smile, and what better way to show it off than acting, right?"

"Or being a model, but you know, it's your life."

"I started that way. I used to model for my mum's art classes." She paused just to look at him again. "I can't believe you're here. I thought I'd never see you again. I thought you'd  
forgotten me."

"Like I said, I could never forget you." He replied, bopping her nose with his fingertip.

"I wonder, would you have coffee with me? My day has been so terrible, but seeing you again has made up for that greatly."

"He's started hitting you, hasn't he?"

"How did you know?"

"Time traveler." 

"Couldn't you have told me?"

"You were too young. Besides, you wouldn't have believed me."

"You could have come to me sooner."

"Well, I'm sorry. I've been very busy saving the world from aliens."

"You always say such nonsense, Doctor." He took off her sunglasses, despite her protests, and looked at her blue and purple eye.

"Come with me. I'll take care of it."

He unlocked the door, and they went inside. Alex was still amazed at all the space in this little box. She was led to a kitchen where he retrieved a few ice cubes and wrapped them in a towel. He then pressed the pack gently to her eye, wincing along with her. 

"I could have done this at home."

"Have you made the mistake of moving in with him yet?"

"Yes, I have. Though, I don't think it's a mistake."

"Look at how he treats you! What other hidden bruises do you have?"

"They've mostly healed now." She replied after awhile.

"You need to leave him, Alex."

"Where would I go? Besides, it's difficult to get away from him when we attend the same school."

"You could come traveling with me. I'll show you wonderful things."

"What about RADA?"

"I could take you to study when it first opened. Or, you could meet Shakespeare. He's a really great bloke... though a little handsy when he's drunk." Alex giggled and shook her head  
lightly. "You still don't believe this is a time machine, do you?"

"No."

"Well, I'll prove it to you! But, you have to agree to come with me."

"I have school, Doctor."

"Ugh, time machine! I can take you to the beginning of the Earth billions of years ago and still have you back in time for your first class. Here..."

He removed the ice pack from her eye, and covered the bruise with his fingers. Out of the other eye, she could see it begin to glow a bright gold. She tried to pull away, but he  
shushed her and held onto her tightly as he mended the wound. When it was over, she ran to a nearby reflective surface to see that the abrasion was gone.

"What did you do?"

"I healed you with my regeneration energy."

"You are just... unbelievable!" She turned to inspect her eye some more.

"Will you come with me, then?"

"I'll need to pack some clothes--"

"No need. The TARDIS will create a wardrobe for you in your bedroom."

"Shouldn't I tell people I'm leaving?"

"I can bring you back at a time where they wouldn't even have noticed you were gone."

"Alright. I'll come." She said finally, and earned herself a smile.

"Brilliant! Where do you want to go?"

"I don't care. Surprise me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, I can't remember if it is Shakespeare that the Doctor owes a chicken to, but I can't remember what episode the line was in. If any of you know, please tell me and I'll correct it.
> 
> EDIT: He owed Casanova a chicken.


	4. Chapter 4

The Doctor showed Alex to a bedroom that had materialized across the hall from the kitchen. When he opened the door, she was surprised to see that it was exactly like her childhood bedroom (with a slightly bigger bed, of course). She looked up at him with a smile before crossing the threshold. It even smelled like her old room.

"How did you know what my bedroom looked like?"

"The TARDIS must have delved into your memory. I guess she wanted you to feel safe."

"Thank you." Alex said to the air.

"Touch the wall and thank her properly."

She put her hand on the door frame and repeated her earlier statement, earning herself a hum as the wall vibrated happily. She gasped and pulled her hand away as though she had been burnt. The Doctor chuckled to himself, and Alex tentatively entered the room.

"It's exactly as I remember." She observed, looking around. "Thank you, Doctor."

"You're welcome. I hope you'll be comfortable. There's a wardrobe that has any sort of clothing you desire." He smiled and began to walk away.

"Wait, you haven't said where we're going."

"You told me to surprise you. Get settled in, and I'll collect you for supper."

He closed the door and returned to the console room, pulling levers and pushing buttons to put them in the time vortex. Meanwhile, Alex stood in front of the vanity table to look over her now normal eye. It wasn't bruised or swollen anymore, and she wondered how he could have possibly healed it. The Doctor was a mystery that she hoped to solve. 

A few minutes later, there was a knock on the door. When she opened it, she was escorted back to the kitchen where the small table was set with tea and sandwiches. It wasn't quite what she had been expecting, but she couldn't complain. If given a choice of a meal, she probably wouldn't have been able to decide anyway - a trait that always got on Ralph's nerves.

"I hope this is ok." The Doctor said.

"It's fine." She replied with a smile.

"Are you absolutely sure you want to travel with me? It's not too late to take you back."

"Yes, I'm sure. I'm curious about you." She studied his face, trying to find traces of aging since the 14 years since they last met. "How old are you?"

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"I'm in a time machine, traveling to who knows when or where. Try me."

"Alright. I'm 943."

"Bollocks."

"I told you you wouldn't believe me."

"When we first met, how did you know my last name? When was the last time you saw me?"

"Spoilers."

"Fine, don't tell me. Keep your little secrets."

He was glad she could smile. He would keep her oblivious to the terrible scene he had witnessed the last time he saw her. He would do everything to change her future and make   
sure it didn't happen again. The Doctor suppressed a shudder as she continued eating, though she looked at him with a puzzled expression.

"What are you thinking about?" She asked.

"Just trying to decide where to take you on your first adventure." He offered a smile.

"I wouldn't mind meeting Shakespeare." 

"Brilliant. What period in his life?"

"I don't mind."

"What's your favorite play?"

"I couldn't possibly choose."

"While we're at it, would you fancy meeting Queen Elizabeth I? I know her personally. In fact, it's because of me that she couldn't have been called the Virgin Queen anymore."

Alex gasped and covered her mouth with her hands. "You're kidding!"

"Nope. We were even engaged to be married."

"Oh, Doctor, you bad, bad boy." She purred. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"What happens to me and Ralph?"

"I can't tell you."

"Why not? How horrible could it be?"

"It's a fixed point in your life." He lied. "I can't tell you, otherwise you'll try to change things, and I'm afraid what happens has to happen. You can't change the past."

"Can you just tell me one thing?"

"What?"

"Do I ever become famous?"

He thought of a way to answer that wouldn't give too much of her future away, but couldn't really come up with anything. He just smiled pitifully at her and sipped his tea. They soon polished off the sandwiches, and Alex excused herself to her room.

Her mind was filled with wonder about what would happen to her. What would become of her relationship with Ralph? Would they get married, have children, and live happily ever after? With the way he treated her, she didn't really want to have to subject kids to it as well.

With a yawn, she decided to look for some pajamas, finding some on the top shelf in the wardrobe. After changing into them, she went to search for the Doctor. He was back in the console room with his back to her. She slowly walked up behind him and tapped him on the shoulder, startling him.

"I just wanted to say goodnight."

"Goodnight, Alex."

She stepped backward, hesitated, then wrapped her arms around him in a tight embrace. The Doctor faltered a bit before returning the gesture, remembering all the other times   
he had gotten to hold her (especially on that fateful day), but never quite long enough. When they parted, she left him with a smile.

Back in her bedroom, she was snuggled under the duvet, wondering what time it was in London. It had to have been nearly 10pm, and Ralph would be getting off work by now.   
She couldn't help imagining the look on his face when he came home to discover she wasn't there. He would no doubt be angry - even more so if he knew the truth about where   
she was.

In hindsight, she didn't care what he felt. Perhaps he could care less about where she was. As if on cue, her cell phone rang, and she was a bit surprised that it still worked wherever they were. Getting up, she retrieved it from the back pocket of her jeans. Ralph's name was on the screen, and she was so tempted to answer it. 

Instead, she pushed the end call button. Setting it on the dresser, she crawled back into bed with a triumphant smile. It was the first time she had ever had the courage to ignore a call from him. After settling down against the soft pillow, her eyes drifted shut and she fell into a deep sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

Alex woke up sometime later from a feeling someone was watching her. When she opened her eyes, she gasped when she saw the Doctor sitting in a chair in the corner. She gave him a fond smile, and he returned it, going to sit on the bed. He brought his hand up to lightly stroke her hair.

"What time is it?" She asked groggily.

"I don't know. You've been asleep for a good six hours, though."

"Were you watching me the whole time." She teased with a grin.

"No, just the past ten minutes. You look so angelic when you sleep. I'm sorry if I woke you, though."

"It's alright."

"I'll make us some breakfast." He stood up and headed for the door.

"Doctor?"

"Yes?"

"What's your real name?"

"I'm afraid I can't tell you that, either."

"Then what can you tell me? I don't think I can trust you if you keep all these secrets."

"Do you want to go home, then?"

"No. Anywhere is better than with him. He called me last night. How was my phone able to work?"

"The TARDIS is connected to any telephone anywhere. So you could call your parents, if you wanted. Make sure they aren't worried about you."

"I thought you said you could drop me back off without anyone knowing I was gone." She arched an eyebrow.

"I can, but it's your choice if you want to let them know or not. Breakfast in five minutes. Then get dressed - I have a surprise for you."

Her heart beat faster in anticipation. Once he left the room, she did call her parents. They asked where she was, and said that Ralph had called them the night before looking for her. She explained that she was with the Doctor - a fact they had trouble believing - but she was insistant.

After she hung up, she headed for the kitchen to find the table set with delicious-smelling food. There was also a tea tray with clotted cream and jam for the scones. Alex smiled at him as she sat down to fried eggs, toast, sausages, and bacon. The Doctor poured her a cup of tea before she began to eat.

"What's my surprise?" She asked around a mouthful of toast.

"Can't I at least keep one secret?"

"You're already keeping loads of them. You won't even tell me your real name!"

"It's a sacred name that I can only reveal through special circumstances."

"Which are?"

"Marriage or death."

"Have you ever been married?"

"No."

"What happened with Elizabeth?"

"I sort of... broke her heart."

Alex clicked her tongue and shook her head as she took a sip of tea. "No wonder she never wanted to marry."

"She reigned wonderfully, though. Especially toward the end. She didn't need a man."

"Are you trying to tell me that I don't either?"

"Well, no one really needs anyone. I've been traveling alone for hundreds of years and I've done alright."

"Don't you get lonely, though? Or, ahem... you know, horny?" Her cheeks flushed pink, and The Doctor smirked.

"I'm too busy saving other planets to worry about being lonely."

"What do they need to be saved from?"

"Invaders."

"I see. Is it dangerous?"

"Very, and no, you can't come with me. I don't want to risk your safety."

"You're risking your own safety." She pointed out. "For someone who is the last of his kind, you'd think you would want to protect yourself. Why do those planets need you so badly?"

"I suppose they don't. I guess I do it out of guilt because of what happened to my own planet. I never want to have to see that happen again."

"You're very selfless." She said after awhile.

Alex finished eating and excused herself back to her room to get dressed. When she opened the wardrobe, she found an array of dresses in Elizabethan style. She gasped in surprise by how amazing they looked. She chose a dark blue silk one, and laid it out on the bed.

In the dresser, she found stockings, petticoats, and corsets. After grabbing a pair of black tights, she slipped on the petticoat, then encountered a problem: how was she supposed to tie the corset. With a sigh, she walked to the bedroom door, opened it, then poked her head out to call for the Doctor.

"I need you to tie this for me."

"That's so close to the perfect sentence."

She rolled her eyes with a playful grin and stepped out of the room with the garment pressed to her chest, turning around to expose her back to him. He stared at the expanse of soft, honey-colored skin, his memory flooding with his hands massaging the tight muscles. He reached out to touch it, but had to stop himself and began to lace it up.

"Thanks." She said when he had finished, then retreated back inside the room.

Minutes later, she emerged in the blue dress, her hair pulled back in the traditional style of the time, and found the Doctor back in the console room. When he turned to look at her, he could feel his hearts stop beating for a brief moment. She looked absolutely beautiful, and would surely win the heart of any man that saw her (especially Shakespeare).

"Is this dress too much?"

"No, it's perfect. You look positively breath-taking."

He noticed her blush, and he whirled around to pull levers and push buttons to get them to their designated time: 1604. The TARDIS lurched, making both of them wobble slightly as she set off through the vortex. Alex smiled with excitement and the Doctor couldn't help but share in her happiness.

He would never get over the way her eyes sparkled whenever she smiled. She was truly a beautiful young woman, who would grow to be even more beautiful. He was jerked out of his thoughts, quite literally, by the TARDIS landing at their destination. Alex squealed as she rushed to the door and opened it, peering out at the surroundings.

"Oh, my god! We're actually here. I can't believe it!"

"Yep. 396 years before you were born."

"Blimey."

The Doctor held out his arm, and she wound hers with it, and together they ventured out into Elizabethan London. It was as filthy as it had always been depicted in history books, and Alex had to hold the hem of her dress up so it wouldn't get caked in mud and feces. The thought that that's what she was walking in nearly made her gag.

"Couldn't you have taken us to the nicer part of London?" She complained.

"I'm afraid it's pretty much all like this."

"So, where are we going now?"

"I thought we could just walk around and enjoy the scenery."

"Which play are we going to see?"

"I thought _A Midsummer Night's Dream_ would be good. I didn't think you would be interested in a tragedy right now."

"Not particularly."

"I must say, I can't get over how beautiful you look."

"You're such a charmer."

"I'm not the only one who can't stop staring." He nodded to every man walking up and down the street, all looking at Alex.

"I hope you'll protect me, then." She purred.

"With my life."

They continued down the street casually, giving friendly smiles to people who nodded at them. Alex couldn't get over how different London looked during these times, and although she appreciated the history, she much preferred modern day London. Though, at least she didn't have to worry about running into Ralph anywhere.

"Are you hungry?" She asked him.

"We just had breakfast."

"I know, but you hardly ate anything."

"I don't need much food. Remember, I'm not human."

"Of course. You just look so normal, I keep forgetting." She paused as a thought came into her head. "So, does everything else about you look human as well?"

"On the outside, yes."

"What about on the inside?"

"I have two hearts."

"Really? Can I feel them?"

"In public? The scandal!" He teased.

"Come on, what would these people care... if you're my husband?"

"I'm old enough to be your great great great great great great great great grandfather."

"Just pretend. I want to know what being married feels like."

"How can I say no to those gorgeous eyes?"

She practically squealed with delight as she hugged his arm tighter. The Doctor was more than happy to give her this little pleasure, considering how badly she was being treated. He wanted to show her what a loving and happy relationship could really be in hopes of making her see the light and get the courage to end things with Ralph.

"Can I feel your hearts now?"

"Yeah. Just step into this alley."

She dragged him between the two nearest buildings, then let go of him when they were halfway through. She stopped and let go of him, and looked up at him with questioning eyes. The Doctor smiled warmly, and she returned it as she tentatively pressed her palms to his chest.

"That's extraordinary." She breathed as she felt the four beats.

This would have been the part where he would lean down to kiss her, but this wasn't the future Alex that he had gotten to know and allowed himself to fall in love with. The urge was very strong, but he fought it because she wouldn't have understood. Instead, he compromised by brushing a stray curl away from her face and tucked it behind her ear.

"What is there to do in Elizabethan England besides walk around and see the sights?"

"Oh, you wanted to do more than that?" He joked.

"Well, even though the sights are amazing, yes, a little more entertainment would be nice."

"We're going to see a play later! How much more entertainment do you need?"

"I'm your guest, so the proper thing to do is cater to my every whim."

"And I will. Just tell me what you'd like to do."

"I don't even know what there is to do!" She had removed her hands from his chest to throw them in the air in frustration.

"If you'd like, I can take us to the time where the play starts."

"Alright then." She sighed.

They returned to the TARDIS, walking arm-in-arm again (which Alex instigated). The Doctor unlocked the door, and they entered the console room. She watched as he glided around the pillar with grace as he put them five hours into the day. The show would start in thirty minutes, but he parked right outside the playhouse. The sun was beginning to set as they exited this time, and it had gotten a little chilly.

"I'll get you a shawl." He said, pulling her back inside.

"It's not much warmer in here." She complained after him.

He smiled fondly to himself and shook his head as he entered her bedroom. Opening the wardrobe, he grabbed what he was after and left, but not before spying a small diary on the vanity table. Of course he would respect her privacy and not read it, unless she told him it was alright. Besides, he already had a pretty good idea of what she had written in it anyway.

The Alex he knew in the short future told him everything, confessing that she could never be that open with Ralph for fear of upsetting him. Plus, she knew that he wouldn't have cared anyway. The Doctor did everything to comfort her, and he was always sad when he had to take her back.

He shook those thoughts from his mind and put on a smile as he returned to the console room. Alex was looking at him suspiciously, but he kept smiling as he wrapped the shawl around her shoulders. They went back out into the evening, with the TARDIS hidden with the cloaking device.

"What took you so long?" She asked.

"Oh, I was snooping through your knicker drawer." He teased, earning his shoulder a smack as she giggled.

"You better be kidding."

"Of course I am. I completely respect your privacy." She looked at him as if that was the most amazing thing she had ever heard. "What's wrong?"

"I'm just not used to having privacy, I guess."

"I know." He replied.

They entered the theatre after buying tickets, then entered the auditorium to find some good seats. Luckily, there were only a few other people there, so they were able to sit front row center. Alex couldn't contain her excitement, a huge smile plastered on her face that would no doubt remain there for the entire performance. Soon enough, the candles were extinguished, and the curtain raised. She gripped the Doctor's hand and didn't let go throughout the whole performance. A few more people had arrived toward the middle of the production, but the theatre was still practically empty. That upset Alex, but she figured that Shakespeare just wasn't that popular yet.

"Why didn't more people show up?" She asked after the show.

"They just aren't sure what to make of his work yet. They think he's a bit of a loony."

"But he's not! He's the most brilliant playwright this country has ever seen!"

"I'm very glad you think so, miss." Said a voice behind her, making her startle and turn around quickly.

Her mouth fell open as she saw William Shakespeare himself, with a scraggly beard, and his face was gleaming with sweat. The smell of alcohol was on his breath, but Alex just couldn't believe that she was standing in front of him. The Doctor reached out his hand and introduced them.

"Hello, sir." Alex squeaked out.

"You may call me Will, beautiful Alex." He replied, taking her hand to kiss her knuckles.

She blushed furiously and giggled like a schoolgirl. The Doctor couldn't help but be a bit jealous, but hid it very well. William looked curiously at him.

"Have we met before?" He asked.

"We have, actually, but I looked different."

"I really enjoyed the play, Will. I'm studying to be an actress myself."

"I'd love to see you perform sometime." He said with a smile. "Perhaps in one of my productions."

"I'd really love to play Lady Macbeth."

"I'm sure that could be arranged." He replied with a sly smirk, bringing her hand back to his lips to kiss her knuckles again.

The Doctor watched their flirtatious exchange and felt the jealousy boil in his blood again. Alex looked at him with a smile and he returned it, to mask his inner feelings. She looked so happy that it was infectious to him. He just wished he could have kept that happiness alive a little while longer.

"So, Doctor, I'm starving. We should go back and get something to eat."

"I insist you both dine with me. I know the best place in the city." William offered.

"I'd love to, but I'm really rather tired."

"May I see you again, lovely Alex?"

"Perhaps."

She hooked her elbow with the Doctor's, said goodbye to Shakespeare, and they both set off back to the TARDIS. She was babbling excitedly about having actually met the infamous playwright, and he just listened with a smile. Once back inside the TARDIS, she tossed the shawl over the railings, then followed him to the kitchen.

"What would you like?" He asked.

"Are you cooking?"

"I suppose I could. You're my guest and everything." He mumbled.

"Do you even know how to cook?" She eyed him speculatively.

"I made breakfast this morning! Plus, I'm over 900 years old, I should have picked up some talents. What would you like?"

"I'm really missing a nice, home-cooked meal at my parents'. My mum makes the best food ever."

"We could drop by, if you'd like."

"Maybe some other time. I don't think I'm ready to have to tell them about Ralph."

"I understand."

"I think I'll just have a sandwich. I'm a little tired from the excitement of the day." She offered him a sad smile.

"Is there anything you'd like to talk about?"

"Besides the mess I'm making of my life?"

"There are so many things I wish I could tell you, Alex."

"I understand why you can't. I'm not angry about it, just curious."

"How long would you want to travel with me?"

"I don't know. How long would you want me?"

 _Forever _,__ he wanted to say. "Whenever you get tired of it, just let me know."  
"What happened today was the most exciting thing that's ever happened to me. I don't think I could ever get tired of that."

"I certainly hope not."

But he knew that she eventually would.


	6. Chapter 6

Later that night, Alex was back in her room in comfortable flannel pajamas that the TARDIS gathered for her. She was writing excitedly in her diary about meeting Shakespeare, and how the Doctor had saved her earlier that day. She smiled fondly at the memory of them walking arm in arm down the Elizabethan London streets, wearing that wonderful dress.

With an absent thought, she touched the wall behind her bed and patted it lightly, hearing a hum in return as the TARDIS welcomed her silent thanks. Putting the journal down, she slipped out of bed to look for him. No surprise, he was in the console room, relaxing in the jump seat.

"Doctor?" She said softly, causing him to startle and rise.

"Yes?"

"I wanted to thank you again for today. It was really amazing."

"I was just happy to see the smile on your face."

"You're a really great guy. I just wish you could be honest with me." She gave him a sad smile and turned to leave.

"Wait."

"What?"

"When you're 33, you'll get the lead in a costume drama called _The Fortunes and Misfortunes of Moll Flanders_ , and you'll be absolutely brilliant."

"How do I know you're telling the truth?"

"I'll take you tomorrow, if you want. But you can't let your older self see you or it will create a paradox in time."

"But yet, I can see my older self? That doesn't make sense." She laughed.

"Of course it doesn't because it's all complicated, timey-wimey stuff."

"Goodnight, Doctor." She chuckled as she returned to her bedroom.

xXx

The next morning, she didn't wake up to the Doctor watching her sleep again, but instead found him in the kitchen, flipping pancakes in a frying pan. Around his waist, an apron was tied, one that made him look like a housewife. She laughed, making him turn around with a smile of his own.

"I can't believe you're wearing that." She said.

"I think it looks dashing."

"You have odd taste in clothing. I mean, what's up with the tweed jacket? You'd think someone as old as you would have decent fashion sense."

"And yours is so much better? Miss Neon Clothes?"

"Oi, it's the 80s!"

"Still, it's terribly tacky. Besides, even later in your life, I swear you always got dressed in the dark."

"Maybe I did." She answered flirtatiously. "Perhaps I had a wild night with some bloke and didn't bother turning the lights back on when I left."

"No, you didn't."

"And how would you know? Did you spy on my liasions as well?"

"No, but... I just know, alright."

"So, was there no one else after Ralph? Do I leave him? Please tell me I leave him."

"I can't tell you that."

"Why?"

"I already said. It's a fixed point, and if I tell you, you'll try to change it."

"What would I want to change? Never meeting the bastard at all?"

"I told you about _Moll_. Shouldn't that be enough for awhile?"

"What happens that's so terrible anyway? What can't you tell me, Doctor."

"Something that I couldn't protect you from."

"And that would be?"

"Why can't you just accept that I can't tell you?!" He slammed the pan down on the stove, making Alex jump at the sound.

She turned and went back to her room, slamming the door behind her. The Doctor sighed as he tossed the pancake into the garbage and retreated to the library. She would no doubt want to go home now, back to her life with Ralph. She would forget all about him and continue her life as usual.

Perhaps it was for the best. He wished he could just tell her what happens in her future. He felt guilty for lying and saying it was a fixed point when it really wasn't. That's why he had gone back into her own timeline in hopes of saving her. If he had to admit it to himself, he was so deeply in love with her that he couldn't bear losing her.

He continued pacing the room, trying to hold back the tears that had been threatening to fall since he left the kitchen. His hands were trembling as his thoughts raced - memories of him and Alex together in the future before that horrible day. He smiled at the memory of her smiling at him.

In his memory, they had just finished making love. Her naked body was wrapped in a deep purple satin sheet under her arms, their legs and fingers entwined as he pressed kisses to her wrist. Her eyes sparkled with her own love for him, and the Doctor couldn't hold back the tears anymore.

Sinking down into the nearest chair, he sobbed quietly. He had never felt this way about anyone, and never would again. He was interrupted by someone calling his name, and he quickly wiped his face as Alex walked into the room. She had changed out of her pajamas and was wearing jeans and a light blue t-shirt.

"How did you find me?" He asked.

"I guess the TARDIS gave me directions. What's wrong? You look like you've been crying. I didn't mean to upset you."

"You didn't. Just my own thoughts."

"Anything you want to talk about?"

"Nothing I want to burden you with."

"You'll feel better if you talk about it. Unless it's none of my business."

"I was just worried that you'd want to go home now."

"Why would I want to? Just because we had a little argument."

"I'm not completely honest with you. That means you won't be able to trust me."

"I trust you more than any of the other men in my life, apart from my father." She smiled.

"Because, apart from him, they treat you terribly."

"Do I ever get better taste in men?"

"I'd say so." He smiled fondly as his earlier memory crept in again. "You're a beautiful young woman, Alex. You deserve everything in the universe."

"I wish I could have just fallen for you, Doctor." She said with a sigh. "Did I fall for you?"

"Yes. But I don't expect you to do it again."

"Why not? You treat me respectfully, you let me have privacy. You haven't hit me... yet."

"I never would."

"Then why shouldn't I fall in love with you?"

"It's dangerous to love someone like me."

"Why?"

"First of all, I'll outlive you by hundreds of years. Secondly, you're already taken. Granted he's a complete bastard, I still respect that you have someone else."

"You think he's not screwing around with another girl?" Alex scoffed. "Perhaps I wouldn't mind having someone else as well."

"Then find a human male. I'm not what your looking for."

"Why not? Do you not have genitalia?"

"Of course I do!" He flushed bright pink, and she couldn't stifle her giggle.

"Then what's the problem?"

"It's not the same as your species. It appears the same, but it's not."

"How? It doesn't burst out with tentacles, does it? Or anything sharp?"

"No. I don't know how to explain it. Just believe that it's different, alright!"

"Fine! Don't get all bent out of shape about it."

He felt awful for lying to her. He had a perfectly normal penis. There wasn't anything abnormal about it. He just wanted to put her off him so he could save himself the heartbreak later. He had made the mistake of falling for her once, and that ended in terrible tragedy.

"I'm sorry. I just can't help being curious about it." She said softly, snapping him out of his thoughts again.

"It's alright. It's understandable."

He wanted so much to be able to tell the truth. Then they could be together and travel through all of time and space. She deserved to see the diamond waterfall on the planet Midnight, or the Singing Towers of Darillium. He would take her everywhere she wanted to go, just so he could see that beautiful smile spread across her face before she kissed him.

"Alright, are you ready to journey to 1996?" He asked excitedly.

"Yes! I'd like to see what I'm like in the future."

"I think you'll be pleasantly surprised." He rubbed his hands together before dashing to the console room with Alex hot on his heels.


	7. Chapter 7

As they landed, Alex couldn't contain her excitement. She kept bouncing from one foot to the other, and the Doctor just watched her with a growing smile. He could tell she was getting impatient at him taking so long for whatever reason, and followed close behind when he headed for the door.

"Don't get ahead of yourself. I'm just checking to see we're at the right time." He said, trying to push her away.

She clicked her tongue and eventually stepped away from him. He opened the door to poke his head out, and she strained to hear the voice of her future self, hoping she would even recognize it. Suddenly, he pulled his head back in, and closed the door.

"What's the matter? Are we there?"

"Yes."

"Can we go out?"

"In a moment."

"Why then? Was my future self walking by or something?"

"No. We're just not at the right time in the day."

"How can that be? I thought you knew how to fly this thing."

"People make mistakes! It's only a few hours past, we just need to go back."

He dashed back to the console, to send them to the correct time in the day. That time, Alex ran out of the TARDIS, ignoring him calling after her. She found herself in a field with a river flowing through it. In the distance, she saw two people on horseback dressed in period clothing, and wondered how far they had actually gone back - if it weren't for the cameras in front of her.

"Cut!" Someone yelled, making her jump.

A man with greying hair stepped out from behind a camera and hurried to talk to the people on the horses. Alex wanted to get closer to them, but thought it best to wait. It was a smart move because the three of them made their way back to the cameras. As they got closer, she could make out the faces of the actors. A man and woman.

She was dressed in a scarlet dress made from what looked like crushed velvet. Alex gasped when she saw her face, her aged face. She was so enthralled that she hadn't noticed the Doctor standing next to her, and she grabbed his arm as a way to make sure the moment was real.

"Is that... really me?"

"Yes."

"What am I like?"

"About the same as you are now, personality-wise. Though, you've acquired a few new mannerisms."

"Like what?"

"When you talk, you gesticulate with your hands more. You also have a bit of a nervous tic where you clasp your fingers together and rub your left thumb with your right."

"I wonder why I do that."

"It's not very often, though. As you can see, you've still kept yourself in wonderful shape."

"I look prettier, don't I?"

"You're pretty now."

"I wish I could talk to her. I never imagined myself to ever be unapproachable. There are so many questions I want to ask. Will it really create a paradox if I go talk to her? Maybe she won't recognize me."

"You look exactly the same. Of course she'll recognize you. Fun fact, your sister, Nicola, plays your mother when Moll was a baby."

"No! Really?"

"Yeah, and it was just as big a surprise to your older self as well."

"I'm sure we had fun on set together." She said with a fond smile. "So, anyway, what was going on in this scene?"

"Well, that man is your fourth husband, and he's asking you to marry him."

"I hope she says yes. He's quite handsome."

"He's the love of her life."

Alex looked at him suddenly to see his eyes glistening as he peered into her own blue-green pools. She suddenly felt warmth settle in her stomach as her heartbeat quickened. Her palms were becoming sweaty, and she briefly wondered if that's what love felt like. She hadn't felt that way when Ralph looked at her. Then again, he had never looked at her  
quite like the Doctor was looking at her.

"Have you seen enough?" His gentle voice asked.

"Can we stay just a little longer?"

"Sure."

She turned around and settled against him, his arms draping over her chest, and she held them. She watched the director and other people of the crew bustling around, but she paid more attention to her older self, wondering what her life was like. Had she finally found someone who treated her right, like the Doctor, or was she still miserable with Ralph?

After filming had wrapped for the day, they followed Alex's older self to her trailer at a distance. A woman from the costume department was waiting outside for her to bring out the dress. When the door opened and she stepped out, she had turned to look at the two of them before going back inside, and younger Alex quickly ducked behind the Doctor.

"Doctor?" She asked.

"Hi, Alex. How are things?"

"They're alright. How have you been?"

"Busy, as always. Planets to save and all that."

"Who is that hiding behind you?"

"My new companion of sorts. She's a little shy."

"Still chasing those women, I see." She smiled.

"I don't chase them, they usually chase me."

"Tell her she can come out, I don't bite."

Alex stepped out from behind him, but kept her head down to hide her face (as if the curls weren't a dead giveaway). Older Alex put two fingers beneath her younger self's chin to reveal her face, but gasped at what she saw. The familiar features that she had always felt were too harsh for her young age were staring back at her.

"Why did you bring her here?" She asked in a whisper.

"She needed to see who she would become. I'm sure you remember the doubts you had when you first started at RADA."

"No. I had actually forgotten them."

"There's no reason to be afraid." Her younger self spoke, her voice not yet as deep. "You weren't supposed to see me, though."

"This is the most surreal thing that's ever happened to me, but I can't say I'm completely surprised. Would you like to come in for tea?"

"Sure. Can we?" She asked him.

"The damage is already done." He answered.

The three entered the trailer, where older Alex put the kettle on. There wasn't much choice for tea, but she was surprised when her younger self had chosen the same as her. _At_  
 _least that hasn't changed_ , they both thought to themselves. The other two took a seat on the small sofa, and said thanks when they were handed their mugs.

"So, Doctor, why haven't you come to see me lately? Though, that's a stupid question."

"It's not just that, I've had other things to do. Besides, I assumed you'd be too busy working as well."

"When was the last time you saw him?" Younger Alex asked, fearful of the answer.

"At least two years now. Not since my divorce."

"I got married?"

"Yes, and I regret every second of it."

"Don't tell me you stayed with Ralph."

"I did, and it was the biggest heartbreak of my life."

"What happened?"

"Well, apart from the abuse, he was a cheater. Has he started hitting you yet?"

"Yeah. He gave me a black eye the other day, but the Doctor healed it."

"Ah yes, I remember that." She smiled at him fondly.

"Why did you stay with him?"

"I thought I loved him, but ended up wasting fourteen years of my life being miserable. Please don't make the same mistake. When you get back, end it with him. Save yourself the heartache."

"I think I will."

"No, don't think, just do it. You'll thank me one day."

"Can I ask something else? Have you and the Doctor... been... intimate?"

Her older self's face reddened as she looked down at her tea, but her eyes flicked back up to his as a slow smile spread across her lips. "Yes, we have."

"Oh boy." He hid his face in his hands. "I don't want to listen to this so I'll just pop outside."

They let him leave so they could talk in private.

"What was it like?"

"Wonderful. He's the most attentive lover I'd ever had. And the things he can do with his fingers..." Her younger self blushed fiercely. "I mean he gives great massages."

"If he was so wonderful, why didn't you stay with him?"

"He would never take me with him on his planet saving adventures because he wanted to keep me safe. He always made the excuse that it was too dangerous, and would never forgive himself if something happened to me."

"Yeah, that's what he told me as well. Did you fall in love with him?"

"Yes, I did. But it broke my heart whenever he would leave, so I had to heal myself. A process that I'm still dealing with."

"I'm sorry if seeing him again is too painful--"

"It's alright. It's nice to remember him." They shared a smile.

"So, tell me about this role. I remember having to read the book in sixth year. Is this production much different?"

"It sticks pretty close to the book, but there are a few changes that happen. The costumes are fabulous, though!"

"I saw the dress you were wearing earlier."

"I'm having a really great time."

"The Doctor said you were brilliant in it."

"He's biased, I'm afraid."

"I am not!" He said, opening the door suddenly to come back in.

"Welcome back." Older Alex said. "Were you eavesdropping?"

"Only during the last part. Are you ready to go yet? You've learned enough."

"I suppose. It was really nice to meet you." She said to her older self.

"Thanks, it was nice to remember how innocent I used to be."

They shared a hug, both ignoring the Doctor's impatient sigh, and younger Alex left with him, giving herself a wave goodbye. They returned to the TARDIS in silence, and he assumed it was because she was still in shock. It wasn't every day that you got to meet your older self.

Upon entering the ship, she headed for her bedroom, but stopped before she was out of the console room. The Doctor watched her carefully as she paced for a moment, then looked at him. Her face was contemplative, and he had a feeling she was bursting with more questions that he couldn't answer.

"Thank you for today. I really learned a lot."

"You're welcome."

"Where did you take her when you came to visit?"

"All over. So many magical places." He remembered with a smile.

"Did you ever take her to see her older self?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"There wasn't a reason to."

"Why?"

He sighed. "Because she killed herself shortly after filming for _Moll_ ended."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit short, but I just wanted something to post.

"What do you mean she killed herself? She seemed happy!"

"I told you you were a brilliant actress." He said in a pathetic attempt to lighten the mood.

"Why did she do it? Did you end up breaking her heart?"

"I don't know. She didn't leave a note."

"Did you look for one?"

"Everywhere in her apartment."

"I wish you would have told me sooner." Her eyes were beginning to fill with tears. "I could have said something to her. To give her hope."

"I don't think there was anything you could have said."

"Then _you _could have said something."__

__"Like what?"_ _

__"I don't know! Tell her you loved her! Tell her that you would take her away from all the sadness! Give her a reason to live!"_ _

__She stormed off down the hall then, slamming the door to her bedroom. The Doctor winced at the sound, then slowly moved to put them in the time vortex. He sat down in the jump seat with a sigh as he pinched the bridge of his nose. The secret was finally out._ _

__Inside her room, she paced some more, breathing harshly, and tried not to cry. She couldn't believe she would ever commit suicide, but if the heartbreak with Ralph was really as bad as she made it sound, it was possible. Though, perhaps Ralph wasn't the only problem. What if she had been in love with the Doctor and he had broken her heart as well?_ _

__She was suddenly angry with him. Exiting the chamber, she stalked back to the console room and found him sitting in the jump seat. Walking around to the front of him, she slapped his face, hard. Her nostrils were flared and she was breathing out of them sharply. He knew she had every right to be angry with him._ _

__"I want to go home, and I never want to see you again."_ _

__"Will you do one thing for me?"_ _

__"What?"_ _

__"Stop seeing Ralph. Please. Don't make the same mistake your future self did."_ _

__"Why do you care what I do? If you had wanted to stop her from killing herself, you would have done or said something differently. Why couldn't you have just loved her?" She  
asked, slapping him again._ _

__"A human and a Time Lord would never have worked. I've explained that to you before."_ _

__"Can't you turn someone into one?"_ _

__"Unfortunately, no."_ _

__Alex sighed again. "Just take me home." She huffed, heading back to her room._ _

__"Alex." He said before she was out of earshot. "I did love her."_ _

__"Did you ever tell her?" She asked without turning around._ _

__"Yes."_ _

__"Did she love you?"_ _

__"Yes, but it wouldn't have made a difference. It was impossible for us to be together."_ _

__"When you started to miss her after she passed away, you could go visit her younger self. Like you did with me."_ _

__"She'd have to fall in love with me all over again."_ _

__"Aren't I worth it?" She asked hopefully, finally turning to face him._ _

__"Of course you are." He offered a smile, and she gratefully returned it. "I'm sorry for upsetting you."_ _

__"It's alright. I'm glad you finally told me the truth."_ _

__"Do you still want to go home?"_ _

__"I guess not. Though, I do have school tomorrow, or Monday, or whatever day it is on Earth right now."_ _

__"Yeah, it would be tomorrow, technically. I'll be sorry to see you go, Alex."_ _

__"It would only be for five days, then you could come get me again. Unless you were out saving a planet."_ _

__"I'd make time for you."_ _

__With an even bigger smile, she walked to him and kissed his cheek, where she had slapped him twice. "Good night, Doctor."_ _

__"Good night."_ _

__He watched her walk back to her room with a small smirk as he returned to his place in the jump seat. He was really happy they had worked that out because he was afraid she would hate him forever. Though, what he didn't tell her was that the reason he had visited her previous self when she was a child was because he missed her future self terribly._ _

__If this version of her fell in love with him as well, he would do everything in his power to fix what had happened in her future and his past. Looking around the console room, he suddenly became bored of having no one to talk to, and wished she hadn't gone to sleep. Though, she must have had the same thought, because she had returned minutes later, covering her yawn with a hand._ _

__"What's up?" He asked._ _

__"I can't sleep." She replied, coming to sit beside him. "There are too many thoughts going through my head."_ _

__"I could fix that, if you wanted."_ _

__"How?"_ _

__"Erase the thoughts that are keeping you up."_ _

__"I wouldn't know where to begin." She sighed, resting her head on his shoulder._ _

__"Can I ask you something?"_ _

__"Yes."_ _

__"When I take you back, would you really break it off with Ralph?"_ _

__"I suppose I would, knowing what's in my future now."_ _

__"Don't do it for that reason. Do it for your happiness and well-being now. You don't deserve to be treated the way he's treating you."_ _

__"I know, but where else would I live?"_ _

__"Here, with me. I'll activate the detection shield and park her on campus. We can stay until you graduate."_ _

__"Won't you get bored?"_ _

__"Probably, but I'd stick around for you."_ _

__"You're sweet, but you should have your own life. I don't wanna get in the way of you protecting people."_ _

__"I want to protect you."_ _

__She looked up at him then, noticing the close proximity of their faces. She could feel his soft breath on her lips, and fought the urge to lean up and kiss him. Instead, she gave  
him a smile before resting her head back on his shoulder._ _

__"You're a good man, Doctor."_ _

__He wrapped his arm around her and pulled her gently closer to him before gently kissing the top of her head. Alex was quickly asleep after that, and after awhile, he carried her back to her room, and tucked her snugly into bed. Brushing the stray curls away from her face, he looked at her longingly before returning to the console room, wishing her sweet dreams._ _


	9. Chapter 9

"Where do you want me to drop you off?" The Doctor asked the next morning at breakfast.

"I guess at our flat. Hopefully he's cooled off enough for us to talk. Don't worry, I'm ending the relationship." She added when he gave her a worried look.

"Good." His face immediately broke out into a smile.

"I just don't know how to break it to him." She wrung her hands nervously. "Oh god, what if he starts crying?"

"You really think he will?"

"Despite how he treats me, I know he loves me."

"What about later on when he cheats on you? He's probably cheating on you now."

"I don't know when he has the time. If he's not working, he's at school or with me."

"They don't have girls where he works?" He arched an eyebrow.

"You're right." She sighed. "I just hope it's not true."

"Would you like me to come with you?"

"How would I explain everything? He'd think I was mad. Plus, I like keeping you all to myself... well, when you actually have time for me."

"I promise to make more time for you, Alex." He smiled and lightly bopped her nose.

"You're not just saying that to keep me from killing myself in the future, are you?"

"No! Of course not, you daft woman." He paused. "So, you never told Ralph about me?"

"That I know a Time Lord? He wouldn't believe me. Also, he'd be insanely jealous. I'm not allowed to even look at another man."

"Well, you've talked to me, hugged me, and even kissed me on the cheek. Twice. What would be my punishment for that?"

"He'd probably beat the shit out of you, then take me home and do the same."

"You see why you've got to leave him?"

"I won't be able to avoid him entirely since we go to the same school."

"I'll take you back to before he started going there."

"It's alright, Doctor. I can be adult about it. Though, if I end things with him, won't that change something in my future? You said our marriage was a fixed point."

"Ah, well, I sort of lied about that."

Alex clicked her tongue and rolled her eyes. "What else have you lied about?"

"Nothing else, I promise."

"Why should I believe you?"

"I never wanted you to find out about the suicide. I could have lied about that, but I didn't."

"And why didn't you?"

"Because I thought you should know what would happen if you kept going down the path you're on."

"So you could stay with my future self." Alex paused. "Would you take me traveling with you forever?"

"If you'd want to come with me."

"Even on the dangerous adventures?"

"What if something happened to you?"

"Then you could just crash into my garden wall again." She said with a smile. "It may be too early to say this, but I trust you, Doctor. I know you'll keep me safe because you loved some version of me."

"I love every version of you, Alex."

"Can I confess something?"

"Anything."

"I wanted so badly to kiss you last night. The moment just felt perfect, but I chickened out."

"Why?"

"I don't know. I thought you wouldn't want me to." She paused. "Would you object if I did now?"

"Perhaps we should get to know each other better first."

"But you do know me."

"An older version." He pointed out.

"How much older?"

"Late twenties to early thirties, during your marriage to Ralph."

"Did I cheat on him with you?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"I don't know. Something about feeling too guilty."

"Well, I wouldn't care about it now that I know he'll do the same to me. Besides, I'm just asking for a kiss."

"I'm not really the kissy type."

"Have you never been kissed before?"

"Not with this face."

"Well, there's a first time for everything." She purred, leaning forward in hopes of their lips meeting, but he stopped her.

"I don't think we should."

"There's no need to be afraid, Doctor."

"I'm not, but I can't help thinking that you're just projecting your future self's love for me to make me feel better."

"That's ridiculous!"

"Would you still want to kiss me if you didn't know about my relationship with your older self?"

"Probably. I mean, I know I'm in a vulnerable state right now, but what's wrong with having a bit of fun? I just want to forget my troubles for awhile."

"You're too young for me right now." He blurted out.

"And I wasn't when I was in my thirties?"

"Well, you were older and more level-headed to make those kinds of decisions."

"And I had just gotten my heart broken, no doubt. So, what makes that different from now? Besides my age."

"It's just not appropriate right now."

Alex huffed. "Fine. Just take me home, then."

The Doctor disappeared to the console room to set the course for London the day that he had taken her, but only a couple hours into the future. By the time they landed, she had finished her breakfast and joined him, but stood by the doors, not saying a word as she looked out the window.

"I guess I'll see you around. Hopefully you'll be single by then." He said to lighten the mood.

"How long will you make me wait this time?"

"I'll give you a week to sort things out. I trust I'll be able to find you in Surrey when I return?"

"Most likely, but check the flat, just in case. You never know, Ralph could leave."

"Alright, I'll see next week, then."

"Yeah. Thanks for taking me to meet Shakespeare." She remembered the moment with a smile.

"Anything for you."

Alex gave him a quick hug before exiting the TARDIS, into the apartment building, and up to the flat. She tried the door knob, but it was locked, so she fished her key out of her purse. When she heard the click, she tentatively turned the knob and slowly pushed the door open. She saw that the living room was empty, so she entered.

"Hello?" She called, but got no answer. "Ralph?" She heard shuffling coming from the bedroom, and soon his form was emerging from the doorway, rubbing his eyes. "Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."

"Where have you been?"

"Walking and thinking."

"Where did you go?"

"To a play in Elizabethan England. I met Shakespeare as well after his production of _A Midsummer Night's Dream _."__

__"Did you? Well, you've always had an over-active imagination." He chuckled._ _

__"It wasn't my imagination. I really was there. I wore period clothes and everything."_ _

__"Right. And how did you get there?"_ _

__"A time machine. While I was walking, I ran into an old friend."_ _

__"You realize how crazy you sound, right? Have you been drinking?"_ _

__"No, I'm telling you the truth. Would you like to know the story about the Doctor?"_ _

__"Maybe in the morning." He replied with a kiss. "Come to bed, sweetheart."_ _

__"I want to talk about what happened earlier."_ _

__"Come on, Alex. I have an early shift."_ _

__"You gave me a black eye, for Christ's sake!"_ _

__"It's gone now, though." He said, inspecting both of them for any slight swelling or discoloration._ _

__"Because the Doctor healed it for me."_ _

__"You didn't mention going to the hospital."_ _

__"Because I didn't. I told you where I was."_ _

__"And you think I'm stupid enough to believe you?"_ _

__"You should, because it's the truth."_ _

__"It's impossible. Time travel doesn't exist."_ _

__"Time travel does exist, just not on this planet."_ _

__"You're barking mad, Lex. You need some sleep."_ _

__"No, I don't. I need you to leave."_ _

__He scoffed. "You're kicking me out of my own flat?"_ _

__"Yes. I can't see you anymore."_ _

__"Where is this coming from all of a sudden?"_ _

__"When you hit me earlier, I just realized I can't let you keep treating me like that. I know what will happen in my future, and I don't like it."_ _

__"How will I keep you in your place if I don't smack you around once in awhile?"_ _

__"Seriously? You think I need to be treated that way? You're such an arsehole!"_ _

__She stormed to the bathroom and slammed the door. Her eyes filled with stinging tears, and when she blinked, they fell down her face. She began to sob against the door,  
ignoring Ralph's knocks, and shouting at him to go away. A couple minutes later when she calmed down, she ran herself a bath._ _

__As she relaxed in the steaming water, her thoughts drifted back to her adventure with the Doctor, and a smile spread across her lips. She couldn't wait until he came back for her. She felt really proud of herself for finally standing up for herself. If was honest, she hadn't loved Ralph for awhile now, and this break-up was inevitable. She couldn't even believe that her older self had actually married him. She was startled out of her thoughts by another knock, followed by his gentle voice._ _

__"Alex, I want to talk. Just talk, I promise."_ _

__Reaching over, she unlocked the door and he soon entered, kneeling down beside the tub. Alex flinched when his hand cupped her face, and was surprised to find a certain look in his eyes. Then she remembered where she had seen it before: It was the way the Doctor had looked at her the night before he brought her back._ _

__"I'm truly sorry for how terribly I've been treating you, and I promise I'll never hit you again."_ _

__"Don't act to me." She sneered, jerking her head away to look at the opposite wall instead._ _

__"I'm not, love. I'm being totally serious. I do still love you. Look at me, babe." He turned her face toward him again, and smiled. "There are those beautiful eyes. Can I get a  
beautiful smile?"_ _

__"No. You can save your breath, as well. I'm not going to believe your lies anymore."_ _

__"Just like you lied about where you really were tonight?"_ _

__"That was the truth."_ _

__"Right." He said sarcastically._ _

__"Perhaps I should have brought the Doctor with me. Then you would know I was being honest."_ _

__"Who is this Doctor?"_ _

__"He's a Time Lord from the planet Gallifrey. He travels through time and space in his spaceship called the TARDIS. I first met him when I was a little girl and he crashed through the fence in my back garden."_ _

__"Do you realize how bonkers that sounds?"_ _

__"Yes, I do, but I know it's real. He took me to the year 1604 and I met Shakespeare, which I told you earlier." She paused, wondering if she should tell him about talking to her older self, but decided against it._ _

__"Are you leaving me for him?"_ _

__"No. I just don't deserve to be abused anymore. We wouldn't work out anyway because he'd outlive me by thousands of years. Tell me the truth about something. Have you been screwing around on me at all?"_ _

__"Nothing beyond innocent flirting, I promise."_ _

__"Define 'innocent'."_ _

__"You know, just playful banter, like we had when we first met. Why would I want anyone else when I've got you?"_ _

__"I want you to leave tomorrow."_ _

__"Where am I supposed to go?"_ _

__"I don't care. And tonight, I'd appreciate it if you slept on the sofa."_ _

__"Please don't throw me out. Give me a chance and I swear things will be so different. I don't want to lose you."_ _

__Alex wanted so badly to believe him and let him stay, but she promised herself she would be strong about this. She didn't want what was in store for her to actually happen, so  
she would do everything to keep it from happening._ _

__"I'm sorry, Ralph, but I can't trust you anymore. Would you like me to tell you what happens to us?"_ _

__"This ought to be good." He scoffed._ _

__"I met my future self as well, and she told me that you eventually cheat on me with one of your co-stars, and I end up killing myself because you left me so heartbroken. I don't  
want that to happen, and would you really want to live with that guilt for the rest of your life? Or would you even care?"_ _

__"This is very hard to believe."_ _

__"I know, but you know I would never lie to you."_ _

__"I wish I could change your mind." He said sadly as he stood up and left the room._ _

__Alex couldn't help but wonder if he really would change. When she was left alone with her thoughts, she seriously thought of giving him a second chance. After mulling it over for the rest of her bath, she got out, went to the empty bedroom to put on pajamas, then went to the living room. Kneeling beside the couch, she gently brushed her fingers through his hair._ _

__"Ok, I'll let you prove yourself, but please don't make me regret it."_ _


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have another chapter, complete with smut! I hope it's enjoyable. Though, I warn you that things will get complicated in the future.

Throughout the next week, Ralph treated Alex better than the Queen herself. She was completely awed by his change, but she couldn't help wondering just how long it would last. Despite that, she found herself laughing genuinely with him for the first time in months, and she had even started enjoying the sex, having her first real orgasm that Saturday when they made up.

The following Saturday arrived, the day of the Doctor's return, and she was suddenly scared to death of what he would say. She hoped he wouldn't be angry, or leave and never come back. Maybe if she just explained, he would see everything was alright now. Luckily, Ralph had to work that evening, so he wouldn't be in the house, and it would appear that she had kicked him out.

She stared at the clock, anticipating the knock on the door, but it never came. The hours passed, and she finally got up from the couch to make supper for herself. As she sat down to eat, the knocking came. With a groan, she went to answer it, peering through the peep hole to see the Doctor's familiar face, and she suddenly wasn't hungry anymore.

"Hello, Alex!" He greeted excitedly, pushing past her eagerly.

"I was expecting you a lot earlier." She said as she closed the door. "I was about to sit down to eat. I could make something for you."

"No, just a cup of tea and some jammy dodgers will do."

"I'm afraid we haven't got any."

"That's alright, I brought my own." He beamed as he pulled the bag out of his pants pocket, and she gave him a puzzled expression. "Bigger on the inside." He explained. "Gotta love a good old jammy dodger with your tea."

Alex returned to the kitchen to make a fresh pot while he roamed around the living room, inspecting her things. He was still looking when the water was ready, and she poured it into the mug. She called him, and he came rushing into the room, taking the steaming cup, and going to sit across from her dinner plate at the small kitchen table. He smiled at her when she took her seat as well.

"So, how have you been? I've been up to loads of things - saving the planets, and whatnot. I was on this planet that was nothing but beaches, and I couldn't help thinking of you."

"That's very sweet." She blushed.

"Yes, your older self thought so too."

"Did you take her there?"

"Yeah, about a month before... you know. I had never seen so genuinely happy." He remembered with a fond smile, and Alex couldn't help tearing up a bit. "I could take you there   
tomorrow."

"I can't go with you." She blurted out.

"Why not? You know I'll have you back by Monday for school."

"I know, and it's not that."

"You haven't left him, have you?" He asked after a few moments.

"No." She admitted, her voice dripping with guilt.

"After everything you know, you haven't--" He growled angrily.

"He promised he would change, and he has."

"But for how long?"

"You should see how he is. Just like when we first got together and everything was wonderful. I have to admit that even the sex is amazing now."

"I don't want to hear it. You promised you were going to get rid of him."

"You make it sound as if I'm supposed to kill him. I love him, Doctor. I can't imagine my life without him. Do you know how it feels to love someone so strongly?"

"Yes, and I'm having to live every day without her because of the mistake she made."

"You still have me, Doctor. I still have about 15 years until That Day. Can't you just come stop me?"

"It's not that simple."

"Why not?"

"Because I have to be somewhere else. I can't change that future."

"What's so important that you can't stop me?"

"I have to save someone else."

"Who?"

"My wife."

"Your what?!"

"Well, she wasn't my wife then. In fact, I didn't even know who she was, but she sacrificed herself for me."

"So that entitled you to marry her?"

"It's a long, complicated, wibbly wobbly, timey wimey story."

"When do you marry her?"

"April 22, 2011."

"I would be..." She counted silently on her fingers. "48 years old. But you have a time machine. Couldn't you save both of us?"

"Do you imagine how complicated that would be? I can't love you both."

"So you're telling me that my suicide is a fixed point?"

"No, it's not, but I can't choose between the two of you."

"Because you would choose her, wouldn't you?" The Doctor was silent, and that was all the answer she needed. "Get out." She said softly, holding in her anger.

"What?"

"Get out." She repeated a little louder.

"Alex, don't do this."

"You better get out of here in the next five seconds, or you'll get a faceful of dinner plate."

"Why couldn't you have been assertive like this toward Ralph?"

"Doctor, I'm warning you. GET OUT!"

She picked up the plate and threw it, but he dodged in time, causing it to shatter against the wall behind him. She stood up quickly, her chair scraping loudly on the linoleum   
floor, and rushed to the other side of the table. He got up as well and ran back into the living room, but he wasn't quick enough.

Grabbing the back of his tweed jacket, she threw him against the wall and slapped his face. He exclaimed at the pain and restrained her wrists so she couldn't do it again. In retaliation, she kicked him in the shins, and also kneed him in the groin, causing him to drop to his knees in groaning agony. She watched as he writhed, cupping himself, while she took the opportunity to kick him in the back.

Alex had never been so angry, and in the moment she couldn't even feel guilty about doing this. It was as if she had blacked out with rage and didn't even realize what was happening. When she was finally done, after she had run out of breath, she stopped. He was still rolling around while she paced the room, breathing heavily.

When she came back to herself, she turned at the sound of one of his groans and gasped as she hurried toward him again. He curled up into a ball to deflect any future beatings, but none came. Instead, she knelt down next to him and tried to survey his injuries through her quickly flooding eyes.

"Oh my God, Doctor, I'm so sorry!"

"It's alright." He choked out.

His left cheek was red with outlines of her fingers, and she didn't want to know how many bruises would be beneath his clothes. With all her strength, she helped him to his feet   
and walked him to the couch, and laid him down gently. Pulling his shirt out of his trousers, she quickly unbuttoned the bottom to reveal his pale expanse of skin.

There were already a few blue and purple spots emerging on his right side, and she couldn't believe she had kicked him that hard. Rolling him over, the same was appearing on his back. Her eyes were streaming now, and she buried her face in his shoulder to sob. Her shoulders were shaking violently, and she barely registered his arm wrapping around her.

"Please tell me you'll be alright." Came her muffled voice.

"I'll be fine. Just need to rest a bit. It's a good thing your boyfriend isn't here." He joked.

"I don't know what came over me."

"I do, and I forgive you."

Alex calmed down when he said that, and she lifted her head to look at him. Even with her red, puffy eyes and tear-stained face, he was still looking at her as though she was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. She couldn't resist any longer, and she leaned forward to kiss him.

It started gentle at first, and when he made no move to stop her, she deepened it. She let out a soft hum when their tongues tangled together, his mouth tasting faintly of tea. Alex crawled up onto the sofa to be able to reach him better, her legs straddling his stomach. Breaking away to breathe, she trailed more kisses down his neck, her thigh coming   
into contact with his semi-hard erection.

"I'm sorry." He said.

"Don't be. Let me take care of it." She whispered.

"We can't."

"I want to make love to you, Doctor."

"I know, but we shouldn't."

"Ralph won't be back for hours." She assured him, as if that's what he was worried about.

"It's not that."

"Then what? I can feel that you want me."

The Doctor groaned when she rubbed herself against his growing bulge, and he was losing his urge to resist. Alex lifted her t-shirt over her head, revealing her bare breasts. Once she dropped it to the floor, she ran her hands up her stomach to cup them both, still continuing the slow rolling of her hips.

"Touch me." She begged, taking his hand to cover her right breast with it.

Alex scooted down a little to undo the fly of his trousers, reaching inside to release his cock. She gasped at its size as it was considerably larger than Ralph's, and she wondered if all Time Lords were proportioned like that. He moaned as she stroked him experimentally, while his other hand attempted to pull down her sweatpants.

She stood up to remove them herself, and he stared at her naked body. She was as beautiful as he remembered. Climbing back on top of him, she gripped him to poise his cock at her entrance, then slowly slid down. She gasped when she encountered a little bit of pain, but continued until it was completely sheathed.

The Doctor hoisted himself into a sitting position as she began to gently bounce on top of him. He captured her lips in another passionate kiss, lightly gripping her hips to help her movements. Her hands found their way under his shirt to explore his back, making him wince whenever she encountered a bruise.

"You feel so good." She breathed against his lips. "Am I as good as you remember?"

"Yes."

"Do you love me, Doctor?"

"Yes."

"This me, I mean."

"Yes, I do."

"I love you too."

She moaned when the downward thrust hit a special spot inside her that had her seeing stars. Angling her hips, she made sure to continue stimulating it. In less than a minute, she was close to an orgasm. Her fingernails were digging into his tender flesh, and her breathing became harsher.

When she came, it was glorious. She had never felt something like that before (not even when she would touch herself late at night at her parents' house). Her vision went a blinding white, and she could have sworn she actually blacked out for a few seconds. 

When she came to, she was resting against his chest as he was lying flat again, something that she didn't recall happening. The Doctor began giggling, and she quickly looked up at him.

"What is it?"

"I was just thinking of River Song, the woman I end up marrying. This is just the thing she would do: Beat me up, then shag me."

"She sounds like a real piece of work."

"She is. My bespoke psychopath."

"Would you introduce me to her sometime?"

"Sure."

"Really?"

"Yeah, why not?"

"I want to go with you. Will you take me everywhere?"

"Of course I will."

"Even to the dangerous planets?"

"I'll think about it."

"Let's go now."

Alex got up, his soft cock slipping out, and she began to get dressed. She didn't need to pack anything, so while the Doctor righted his own clothes, she wrote a lengthy note to Ralph explaining everything. When she finished, she put her shoes on, and dragged him out the door, the broken plate and bits of food still on the kitchen floor.


End file.
